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5:30 PM
with my nephew currently by my side, my dear dear has fall sick.. so ke lian.. and mi as a gf cannot be by his side take care of him.. all i could do is to chase him to slp, miss him and pray that he will recover soon.. he has been so nice and sweet towards me.. I love you dear.. tat's all for nw.. nit to acc sis to vivo to buy present for bro in law.. I miss u lots.. hope u be feelin better and i can see u tml.. Muacks..
Always by your side SnOwY
4:50 PM
hehe.. i juz woke up.. seem like so long that i had slept until so late.. was very very happy.. morning went to pick dear dear flight.. was so excited.. hehe.. n i make him kan jiong also.. hehe.. the plan is suppose to told him i can't pick him up.. den i go hide.. left jh there to pick him up de..(am i very mean? bt he left in town.. blehz..) but wen he reply, he sound so upset.. so i decided to stand outside the gate and he can see mi once he came down.. hehe.. Finally, I SAW HIM!! hehe.. he's happy to see mi.. keke.. wanted to hug n kiss him so badly.. who's nOe.. tis stupid idiot juz saw mi told mi his two wishes are fullfilled which is fly in the storm n emergency in plane.. wth.. angry i walked away.. dun wan anythin to happen to my dear.. i won't nOe wad to do de.. anyway, i can't get angry for long coz i really miss him like crazy.. and i wan to be back in his embrace.. hee.. (*face red red le) Stacy n jh was so nice.. they help him to push the luaguage so he can hug mi n hold mi.. hehe.. i really owe them one.. they got to work today n they were kindda tired also yet they still acc mi dwn to pick him up.. really love them deep deep.. send dear dear home 1st coz he "da bao xiao bao de".. and he wants mi to go into the house bt mama dun allow.. so i kuai kuai stand outside.. hehe.. i really miss him like crazy.. so happy.. hee.. yeah! haha.. i'm goin crazy le.. blehz.. tat's it for now.. nit to go find some stuff to eat le.. very very hungry.. hee..
Always by your side SnOwY
6:43 PM
MERRY CHRISTMAS! Been acc and helpin ppl to shop for christmas present.. went shoppin since Friday.. shop shop n more SHOPPING! Ytd was great.. acc jh to buy Stacy present but i make him buy mi 1 too.. n it cost him 200 bucks for a GUESS bag.. lolx.. and i bought a little bag myself for 35 bucks.. hehe.. it's a sling bag.. so happy.. hehe.. den went for dinner and wait for Stacy.. everything was fine.. been well controlling my emotion until we meet up with Stacy.. she makes mi think of dear dear.. i miss him so much.. tears are bout to roll down and i'm tryin very hard to force it back.. until dear dear ask mi to call him.. i know that he miss mi alot too.. but the more he tell mi he miss mi the more i can't hold on to the tears.. at first bluff my way thru that i was havin a cold.. bt jh msg dear dear ask wad happened.. there after i tried to calm dwn too.. but in the end nt very long calling dear dear makes mi miss him even more.. really breakdown.. tried to ac with him but he's wasn't really happy bout it.. bt i dun wanna him to noe i'm upset.. i wan him to be happy.. but i guess in the end i just mess everything up.. i just make his Christmas bad.. i'm very sorry dear.. i din wan to.. i'm sorry.. really sorry.. too many things happened at a time.. i really can't handle it.. sorry..
more shopping today.. i have been spending about 200 bucks for myself.. hehe.. bought myself clothes and bags.. and i received many christmas present this yr! nv had so many christmas present before.. i'm so happy.. find that i was being pampered so much by so many ppl.. i'm so lucky.. i'm the luckiest ger in the world.. woo hoo.. hee.. have to rush out to meet Stacy le.. and the happiest thing thats goin to happen is that my SUGAR HONEY is coming back to sg today.. i can finally see him.. it's been so long.. i wan to hug him.. i dunno hw will i react wen i see him.. hee.. 5hr 30 mins to see him again.. gonna be late le.. Stacy gonna kill mi soon.. hee..
Always by your side SnOwY
8:08 PM
Bought his present and 2 t-shirt frm Mango coz they having sale plus dear dear say must wear t-shirt.. so spent total of 26 bucks for my t-shirts.. hee.. dear dear must be happy.. hee.. supposedly help jh to buy present for Stacy but dunno which Guess bag she is referrin to.. haha.. so ended up nv buy.. scare i buy the wrong thing.. bt i was so tempted to buy instead for her but me.. hee.. bt if still buy must pull the pants tight tight le.. spending money like tap water.. yokeling ask to go club today but nO mood to go coz dear dear wasnt around to pick mi up.. so kuai kuai dun go.. hehe.. ended up dun wan to fly her kite so ask if she wants to go ktv pub not.. and i got my cousin to come along so i can intro him two pretty gers.. hee.. i still miss dear dear alot.. dun wan to disturb him as he also once awhile den see his cousins and uncle.. i also dunnO whether am i jealous of the ger he's referring to.. bt i doesn't seem like it.. or rather i miss him till i wan to cry.. the others doesn't matters at all.. haiz.. will he come back faster.. i want to see him so badly.. haiz..
dear dear say there's alot of raw food infront of him.. he must be enjoying his food there.. hehe.. bt i can't seem to eat much.. no appetite.. and feel like crying.. cannOt let dear dear nOe.. later he will be upset too.. must be happy.. hee.. my heart feeling the "sourness".. haiz.. tink i go get ready den go out.. stay home will tink too much de.. dun wan to miss him too much.. hee.. lalalala.. haiz.. bye bye.. be back again..
Always by your side SnOwY
1:42 AM
I'm very upset.. Super upset.. the 1st night he isn't with mi.. everytime i go out with him or anyone, he will come and pick mi up.. nw i have to go home myself.. where the roads we use to walk together the place where we will hide.. it's just upset me that i have to go back on my own.. and he's nt around.. the whole day been tryin to put up a smile.. can't bear to let him check in.. when he finally check in, my tears wanted to roll dwn bt i force it back.. it was so painfull to see him leaving mi.. keep lookin at the photo we took today that was on my wallpaper and screensaver.. my mood was down to the extreme.. dun feel like goin out to anywhere this few days till he's back.. i dun wan to continue the journey without him.. and nw my turn to say he's a stupid idiot.. ppl very upset thou he din nOe.. yet still wan to say so many things to try irritating mi.. and i really miss him so much.. finally, my tears came rolling dwn my cheeks.. i juz wan to have him around mi.. i wan to love him, hug him and kiss him.. SHIT.. we are juz together yet y am i so emotionally attached to him.. hmpZ..
went shopping with Jing Shi earlier on.. so went to look at smth which he wants to buy.. bt out of stock at Tangs.. and I FOUND IT.. bt i din bring any cards out only cash which is only 40 plus.. so can't get it.. JS was saying she paid for it den i trf to her bt when we went back, they are closing.. someone told JS today the shops open till midnight.. yet they are close by 1030! wth.. sianz.. have to go back tml to get it.. i'm so scare it will be sold to someone.. otherwise i will cry le.. spending money yet again.. hehe.. haiz.. i'm still very upset.. the only thing tat i'm happy is i heard his voice but it juz make mi miss him even more.. and have to think tat i'm gonna celebrate tis yr christmas alone is such a fantastic idea.. haha.. and i have received the 1st christmas present from my 2nd sis.. yeah.. i love her.. i already unwrapped it le.. hehe..
my christmas wish is to have him by side nw.. to hold him, kiss him, hug him, love him and every other things.. *cry
Always by your side SnOwY
3:18 PM
was very happy recently.. as there is someone always there for mi.. showering mi with love and care.. doting mi like i'm a little girl.. Love mi like a princess.. hehe.. bt he's gonna leave mi for 4 days.. and it's Christmas.. bt it's ok.. coz he be in my heart always.. i will be missin him and waiting for him to come back.. to be back in his embrace.. He's simply too sweet.. the way he pray for us, he smile and he angry.. it's so sweet.. and when he's in uniform, he's so smart and super handsome.. bt i nv say when he's nt in his uniform he's nt handsome ar.. hehe.. was quite upset when i have to tink tat he's gonna go oversea a few days.. seem like i'm so emotionally attached to him le.. but things will always be better.. had to tink on the bright side ya.. hehe..
And i have been tryin to settle Stacy and JH stuff.. we are really twins.. haha.. she be jealous with mi as jh had once go after mi.. but it was million years ago.. bt she cannot let go off it.. she's so insecure and needs lots of assurance from jh.. where jh dunnO hw to give her those.. I understand how she feels.. coz i have been feeling insecure and needs assurance.. He gave mi the assurance bt the insecure is smth i tink only time can give and heal.. and i'm also jealous of her if one day if he left mi for her.. coz i find her threatening.. hehe.. nt really la.. bt we are too similar in most of the ways.. maybe he will fell for 2? keke.. no la.. he's mine only.. hehe.. blehz.. Hope things between the two of them will work out fine.. coz mine is fine.. tink i too easy to go after le.. hehe.. actually to be frank, i din 1 2 let myself for in love for a long period.. but the many many little things he had done for mi really move my heart.. is he make mi fall in love nt i let myself fall in.. nw i say all these, if he happens to read it, he must be flyin n hitting the roof.. hehe
the other thing that i'm upset was that dunnO wad happen.. my buddy suddenly was so different.. haiz.. hw i wish things will be better.. it seem like i gain someone and i lose someone at the same time..
* Thank you my LORD for sending him to me. i have never felt so much love by someone.. I will cherish him and YOU..
Always by your side SnOwY
1:26 AM
It been a few days since i updated my blog.. Apparently, there's nothing much to update.. hee.. the only thing that to update was i was admitted to hospital today morning due to my hyper-ventilation.. hee.. but nw since i was able to blog means i'm fine and healthy again.. hehe.. was on drip n done blood test.. the result was ok.. everything was fine.. hehe.. and my gf rush all the way dwn to hospital coz Solomon was the 1 who send me to hospital and he was quite freak out by me and was kind of lost i guess so he called Stacy.. they both acc mi till 6 plus in the morning.. I really appreciate what they had done for me.. Love them deep deep.. Hee.. and my apology that i make them so worried for mi.. and of coz my 2nd sis who can't slp the whole night wantin to make sure i'm fine.. I'm so happy i have so many ppl around mi who cares and love mi alot.. I'm feeling the luckiest ger in the world.. my world is so much happier.. with them and everyone else around.. like i'm a protected animal.. hee.. Thank you for comin into my life.. Thou i din know Stacy darling for long but we are like twins.. we know how each other thinks and what each other wants.. and the care and concern that nt a friend who just met will give each other.. it seem that we are very very long time friend.. and Solomon dear, thank you for taking care of mi when i'm in that situation.. the many many little things that you had done for mi is all in mind.. thank you! I love you all!! Hugs and kisses!!
Always by your side SnOwY
8:09 PM
I am so so so ANGRY with myself.. people who dunno hw to cherish their life why do i bother bout it.. if you want ur love 1 to worry bout u den they aren't consider your love 1! why must ppl speed? I'm so angry of myself to care for them and worry about it.. i shldn't even bother.. i just dun wan to see someone juz leave my life again.. i dun wan i'm talkin to this person tis min and nx min tat person is no longer there.. it's very cruel to ppl who are alive! one person like tat, 2 person also that.. 3 person also like tat.. i give up! i dun wan to care anymore.. Anyway, i'm just a nobody to anyone.. i shldn't even feel upset or even cry.. Whatever u all wants to do.. it up to u.. i dun care neither do i wan to bother..
Always by your side SnOwY
2:07 AM
There's this saying: "错的人在对的时机相遇和对的人在错的时机相遇 = 有缘无份.." (You meet the wrong person at the right time and meet the right person at the wrong time is equivalent not fated..)
First of all, how do we define who is the right or wrong person and what is the right or wrong time? we aren't anyone to define it.. there's also a saying why GOD create man and woman.. it goes like GOD seperated a soul into 2.. and place each in a pair.. but seperate the pair.. so everyone motives is to search for the other.. they might be at the other side of the world.. some ppl might find their soul mate some might need to search for very long whr some will never find it.. we are trying to find our the other half.. so we go into a rs.. and we realise he/she isn't your the other half, so u let go.. but during that period, you have put in lots of emotion and to draw back isn't easy but you just have to.. u smile, u laugh, u cry, u angry, etc.. n u feel hurt.. ur world is so dark.. u can't se anyting.. u r desperate to get out of it.. no matter hw far u run, or trying to climb out of it, you just simply can't do it.. when u r so tired of it, u r out of ur wits, we will hide in 1 corner and cry.. suddenly, u feel there's smth.. u look up.. there you go.. ur ray of hope.. so u try to run towards it.. bt it seem so near yet so far.. so u gave urself more strength with the hopes of you be reaching.. suddenly, the ray of hope was diminished.. you tried once, twice,... but there's always a limit to any and every things.. this time, you saw another ray of lights but u dun dare to run towards it.. coz u r afraid of disappointment and the hurt and pain u r gettin it..
Basically, this is how i feel if anyone understand that's provided that person doesn't has a sound mind.. coz i dun ve 1 nw.. hee.. i too timid nw.. i have no courage, strength n energy to run towards the ray of light.. it's too difficult.. i may look the way you tink i am bt i may nt be wad u tink i am.. it's too complicated.. arr.. i'm talking things that dun make sense.. hehe.. crazy me.. save mi pls.. =X
Being Happy is a choice not a chance.. hehe..
Always by your side SnOwY
1:18 AM
HapPy beLatEd bIrThDaY to MySeLf Was celebrating my birthday at MoS on saturady night as i was thinking after 12midnight it will be my birthday! haha.. there was many groups of frenz there.. but i felt very left out.. and i probably left some ppl out too.. so i was at depression mood.. wasn't really very happy.. and the worst of all is that i got molested.. i was so so angry.. anyway.. i tried to enjoy myself.. Yokeling came by.. i was so happy.. it was a yr ago i saw her.. miss her so much.. haha.. n i dunno how tis kissing thing started.. haha.. i kept kiss Yokeling and Stacy cheeks.. haha.. and to my big big surprise, i french kiss Stacy.. haha.. Han n solomon was like blur.. haha.. neither can i believe i did tat.. lolx.. my 1st kiss was given to her.. keke.. and i dance like 7 hrs i guess.. almost non-stop.. i dunno wad else to do.. i can't possibly seat dwn there and talk as they are diff ppl.. so the most simple thing to do is to make them all dance.. and i was running up n dwn.. met the director of MoS.. he's gettin mi the membership and stuff.. got mi drinks as well.. i partically drank alot.. fr the drinks he gave mi plus Yokeling's frenz shots and Han n Justin bottle of chivas n drinks.. but i wasn't drunk.. neither high.. i'm still very sober.. hw much i wish to get drunk.. at least mind is empty n happy.. haha.. party till they close at 6am.. reached home bout 7.. bath n slp.. woke up at 12plus.. den my mood is at the bottom.. i cried.. i feel so upset.. decided to go church.. so got Solomon to bring mi along.. hehe.. the church was very nice.. thou it's traditional but can find the peace there.. the songs they sang are smoothing.. the preaching today is about repenting.. the service end at 620pm? no program so he acc mi the rest of day otherwise guess i will be at home rotting.. went to watch this movie called "The last kiss" it's a story about hw ppl tends to stray away fr their relationship and hw to preserve a rs.. I find it a very nice show.. den went to Swensen for dinner.. and he order a slice of cake since i din have any birthday cake.. it was very nice of him to order tat.. haha.. at least i got my chance to make a birthday wish before my birthday ends in an hr or so.. Someting to brighten up my day at the very least.. =) *1 quote fr the movie: " It doesn't matter how you feel towards the one you love. What matters most is what you have done to your love ones.." Any comments?
Always by your side SnOwY
1:56 PM
Tonight, i'm celebrating my love with you! haha.. oops.. not love is BIRTHDAY! yeah.. tonight gonna go MoS party all night long.. better dun be like the last few times whr haben reach 1 i'm dead le.. haha.. tat's partly the reason y i choose MoS coz the alcohol is expensive in there.. but then, tonight is 1 for 1 whole night.. omg.. haha.. contradicting.. keke..
i'm kind of moody actually.. guess i'm being affected by Han n Stacy stuff.. i'm still pickin up my mood.. so i will still be happy at night.. hehe.. i also dunno who be goin tonight..
HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY!!!
Always by your side SnOwY
2:43 AM
Yeah! i juz did my facial mask.. haha.. suddenly, i tot of many happy things.. the times where we did a count down in cinema.. haha.. hw i celebrate my 18th and 20th birthday.. hehe.. hw i am fell in love with someone.. my previous boyfriends or maybe those i like bt no result de.. bt i'm very glad that most of them are my good friends nw.. was watchin this drama "Love story in Harvard".. it's a very sad and touching love story.. i cried almost every epi.. haha.. but the thing is tat those things that happened in the drama will nv happen in real life.. but guys, can you all learn abit.. u can really make the gers fall on their legs.. haha.. Xian Yu is so unromantic bt romantic.. haha.. aiya.. u muz catch the show den u will noe why i say it's nice.. bt the other thing is, i'm a very emotional person.. so i can watch tv until cry de.. haha.. anyway, shld be time to slp le.. my world is spinnin around mi le.. din really slp since ytd.. nitez..
Always by your side SnOwY
8:35 AM
It was Han's bday ytd.. went suntec for dinner with his group of frenz and of coz the future gf.. keke.. the two of them drivin mi crazy.. keep throwing temper for nothing.. haiz.. have to counsel them both den things are better.. haiz.. den afterwards went to this ktv pub at boat quay.. on the way, i saw my ex-student fr CSBS.. so great to see them again.. was catchin up with them abit den have to join Han they all le.. they open a bottle of Chivas.. my fav drink.. heee.. and coz Han is driving, he can't drink much.. so i'm tryin to help him drink as much as possible.. we tryin to finish the bottle.. and i drink alot.. omg.. here's the prob, the more i drink, the more sober i am.. my mood is like fr very high falls to the bottom.. i told myself to be happy bt the more i drink, the more upset i am.. cute rite.. haha.. so Han send mi home 1st.. while he was sending mi back, charlie was waitin for mi at my hse dwnstairs, bt i din wan to see him at all.. my mind is very clear tat i have no feelings for him anymore.. so i managed to get him home.. and my dear brother, Han, he went to look for another "fling".. the story for the fling is kindda long so to cut it short, it's similar to me.. den i ended up scolded him for an hr.. he finally got wad i mean.. to be a man.. dun make the girl hang in the air.. haha.. and nw, after drinking, i shld feel sleepy yet i am still so awake.. omg.. time to psycho myself.. haha.. celebration = Happy.. the more celebration = the more happy.. keke.. haha.. sleepin time le.. otherwise later my nephew wakes up, dun nit slp le.. keke.. i wan go ice skate.. keke.. so long nv skate le.. sure forget hw le.. lolx.. in my dreams, we will continue the never endings.. mOrnIng!
*Han, it's all ur fault to make mi feel sad.. i'm suppose to be happy k! u idiot.. make my mood drop to the bottom.. nw i have to pick it all up again.. arrr... nw u aren't the biggest.. i'm gonna be the biggest coz my bday is ard the corner.. lalalala.. haha.. i'm crazy! =P
Always by your side SnOwY
4:07 AM
Just got back fr KTV with han n his future gf.. haha.. what a long time i nv seem him.. keke.. tried to drive his car as his car is manual.. bt can't drive much.. the car engine go dead 2 within a short distance.. haha.. i gave up in the end coz i dun rem hw to drive it.. it been almost a yr since i got my license.. haha.. i'm too use to auto car le.. lolx.. bt i told him when he's free, let mi use the car so i can practise.. lolx.. i happier as the days goes by.. can't wait for my bday.. haha.. it's a celebration.. bt dunno will many ppl go nt.. if nt i tink i will be upset.. haha.. i like to have many ppl around me even thou i'm nt the centre of attraction bt i juz glad to have many ppl around mi.. haha.. my buddies they all dun seem too keen on club for my celebration.. i'm abit of upset.. if they nt goin, i really dunno who's be goin le.. later i be there alone.. haiz.. keke.. bt i tink i will still find someway to celebrate it.. it's my bday, so i have to happy right.. haha.. whatever.. i'm crazy.. hee.. cheers.. see u guys and gals there!
Always by your side SnOwY
1:04 PM
I guess i'm so upset these days nt bcoz of wad had happened bt it's the friendship we are losing it.. Fate brought us together to be friends.. from a stranger to a friend.. it's been so many years that we are friends.. personally, i cherish all my friendship.. whether it's a close 1 or juz a friend.. i get very upset if i'm gonna lose 1.. bt i believe wad a true friend is, is when u have done smth wrong, they will point out to you and nt just let it be.. i'm glad i have my buddies to be with me.. the many times they pointed out my mistakes.. thou they are guys, but they really are my best mates.. it's nt so neccessary tat guys and gals can't be friends.. they can be the best mates ever.. even 2 girls maybe best mates, wad if both fell for the same guy? will they let the other parties have it or have a fair competiton or juz stab them at the back? i did try to make more female friends and gave them my heart bt most of the times, it's always nt a good ending and i'm juz hurt in my little own corner.. friends will always be there for you wen u need them the most.. they will lend u the shoulder to cry on, their ears for your complaints and do their best as a friend..
if you are reading, this is wad i wan to tell u..
at first wen i say i need to meet u up bt i didn't know what i want to tell u.. bt nw i tink i know what to tell u and tat is "my mind is clear and i won't do anything else to break this friendship.. i cherish the friendship i had with you.. i hope you do.. and i pray over here tat we will be back to the same old us.. i do not wan to lose this friendship.. i hope our sky will be clear from now on.. see u soon.."
Always by your side SnOwY
3:43 AM
Gloomy days..
After all these days of thinkin, i feel like shit.. i seriously dun tink i should be treated this way.. Indeed, all these are brought upon my own.. When u like someone, u doesn't need to be with that person.. as long as that person is happy, you will feel happy.. u will do whatever that's to make that person happy w/o tinkin of any returns.. everything takes two hands to clap.. if the other party doesn't like u, there's no point for u to force things to happen.. as there won't be any happiness or stuff.. all u will see is the hurt and unhappiness.. i tried to be happy.. i tried fake every smile n laughter.. bt deep inside mi, i'm cryin.. really dun understand why things will ended up this way.. if u say u juz wan to continue stay as frenz, dun kiss, hold or hug me.. tis wasn't wad frenz do.. dun go MIA leavin mi with no clue.. is tis wad u called frenz? i'm nt a toy.. i'm juz a human being.. with flesh and blood.. u left me alone to handle all this crap.. hw could u be so cruel towards me.. u dun do tat to any of ur frenz.. bt why me? i'm juz a normal person.. i can't handle anything.. i'm totally lost.. i can't find my inner peace.. there's so many times that i wanted to breakdown.. do u noe hw terrible i'm feelin right nw.. you are the biggest DONKEY in the world.. i really can't believe u did tis to me.. am i suppose to walk pass u and act as thou i dunno u? i'm really goin crazy.. where are you when i needed you the most?
Always by your side SnOwY
When your are down please remember i m always there for you*
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